Anthony Bourdain's death shook them. Now Phoenix chefs are building a community of support

On paper, Bryon Freeze was doing well.

In 2007 he got his first big break cooking under chef Mark Tarbell at Tarbell's restaurant in Phoenix. After a few years in Arizona, he moved to California where he worked as an executive chef in several restaurants. In 2014 he won an episode of "Chef Wanted," a competition show on Food Network.

"But I was also my own worst critic," Freeze said.

He was drinking a lot, experienced bouts of depression and wrestled with drug addiction. 

Freeze says he is no longer dependent and he feels lucky to have come out the other side. Now Freeze wants to help others in the food and hospitality industry — not just chefs, but everyone from waiters to dishwashers — find the resources to do the same.

Substance abuse is common in restaurants

Between 2008 to 2012, substance abuse rates were highest among workers in the food-service industry, according to the U.S.Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration.

To combat the issue, Freeze, who now works as a salesperson for food distributor WA Imports, formed an organization in July 2019 called Culinary Love to provide resources and financial support for hospitality professionals experiencing depression, addiction or mental illness.

He's teamed up with Phoenix area chefs for the initiative, some of whom include:

• Adam Allison of Handlebar Diner.
• Delilah Becerra of MLB clubhouses.
• Keri Frazier of 3onSmith Cafe.
• Juan Zamora of Chula Seafood.

"It's terrifying trying to start something new," Freeze said. "But the time to talk has passed. It's time for quantifiable action. It's going to take time, patience and asking for help — and chefs don't like asking for help."

Freeze said that while he's been able to recover, not everyone has the same resources as him, such as ability to pay for mental and physical health services.

The Anxiety and Depression Association of America noted one therapy session could cost $100 or more. On top of that, about 85% of restaurant workers don't receive health insurance from their employer, according to the Economic Policy Institute, a nonprofit think tank.

Why this could be a turning point for chefs

Freeze cites Anthony Bourdain's suicide in June 2018 as a turning point in the national conversation. It seemed more acceptable to talk openly about mental health issues in the restaurant industry, he thinks.

"There are a lot of things that are taboo to talk openly about," Freeze said. "Talking about mental illness. Talking about not having health insurance."

It can be hard for restaurant employers, especially small businesses, to provide those benefits when they're working with small margins, Freeze admitted.

Culinary Love is still in the early planning stages, but he wants the organization to eventually provide financial aid for people seeking mental and physical health services.

To fund these services, Freeze is selling clothing, planning to hold fundraising events and asking for donations from businesses outside the restaurant industry, such as food supply manufacturers and distributors.

'I was on the brink of losing everything'

Juan Zamora, chef at Chula Seafood, said he knows what's it like to run on fumes. He's had friends, and still has friends, who are dependent on drugs and alcohol, who have been admitted to the hospital for attempted suicide.

"I used to know exactly where to go to have several drinks after work to numb and distract," he said. "Drugs are heavily used in the industry because they keep you going. ... A lot of people use cocaine. Unfortunately we have the old culture the kitchen industry was bred under."

Zamora, who's been seeing a therapist for the past three years, hopes his worst days are now behind him. About four years ago he checked into a psychiatric hospital for anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts.

"I feared I was getting worse," he said. "I was on the brink of losing everything I had, my family. I have a son and wife. I was putting them through traumatic experiences as well."

Getting help, although scary, was the best thing that could have happened to him, he said.

Zamora envisions Culinary Love as a platform to provide educational material online, as well as access to online therapy sources. He's also interested in the organization providing group therapy with a qualified professional leading the sessions.

"I want to utilize our connections and culinary powers in the Valley," Zamora said. "We have such a nice, tight-knit community. Why not utilize that to our advantage to reach out to those in need?"

'Our culture is set up to not admit weakness'

Keri Frazier, owner of brunch joint 3onSmith Cafe, operated the food truck Left Coast Burrito Company for almost three years. As a single mom with two sons, the food truck lifestyle had taken a toll on her family life.

It was hard to say no to events because it meant saying no to money, Frazier said. But ultimately, she decided that her family was more important.

"I needed to pay attention to my work-life balance, physical health, mental health," Frazier said. "We sacrifice that stuff in the industry. We don't always eat healthy because we're eating over a trash can. We don't get paid time off. There's no time to work out."

Some time after announcing her decision to sell the food truck, Zamora reached out to her about participating in Culinary Love.

Frazier said she still feels stressed and at risk of slipping back into workaholic habits. Having people she knows she can turn to for help won't take all the stress away, but it makes a difference, she said.

"Anybody who goes into this industry likes a little bit of chaos," Frazier said. "I love feeding people. I love food and people, my two favorite things, and I can't see myself doing anything else."

For more information about the organization, visit the Culinary Love website.

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Have a story tip about mental illness or health care in the food and food-service industries? Reach the reporter at Priscilla.Totiya@azcentral.com or 602-444-8092. Follow her on Twitter: @PriscillaTotiya.

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