Christmas gifts for UT Vols fans, Tennessee QB Jarrett Guarantano, Neyland Stadium and more
My Christmas shopping is already done. And all it cost me was time.
Craig Jenkins: A bumper sticker that reads “Kill It and Grill It.”
Uncle Tommy: Hiring and firing power at UT.
Angela Gosnell: A laugh muffler.
Serena Williams: A restrictor plate for her temper.
Pam Spruiell: A lifetime pass to Rick Springfield concerts.
Brenna McDermott: Anything orange.
Kyle Shurmur: A Power T for target practice.
Migos: A Pulitzer.
Manny Machado: A hustle clause in his new contract.
Jon Gruden: His old job.
Raiders: Tom Flores
Steve Megargee: Davis Cup tickets.
Preston Hood: A map of Mongolia.
ETCH third floor: Gourmet vending machine.
Serious Football: A comeback.
SNL: An Alec Baldwin impersonator.
Jimmy Hyams: A Natchitoches meat pie.
Marriott: William Holbert paintings in every room.
Chris Marshall: A Grammy.
Dale Wolfe: A smooth trigger finger.
Melinda Adams: An Irish accent.
John Adams: Another best-seller.
News Sentinel: An office manager half as good as Donna Colburn.
Major League Baseball: A pitcher limit.
Margie Holbert: Talking felt dolls.
Atlanta: A bigger bypass.
Tennessee fans: A bumper sticker that reads: “Neyland Stadium is a treasure.”
Ben Easterday: A German shepherd to train.
SEC: A website worthy of its football reputation.
Men’s Final Four: Rick Barnes and Bruce Pearl.
Women’s Final Four: Tennessee and UConn.
Amit Patel: A second-chance dance.
Ben Frederickson: A cure for his headaches.
Jordan-Hare Stadium: Press box telescopes.
Vee Oglesby: A crown that never comes off.
Andrea Stansberry: A cross-country championship.
Tony Headrick: A Mandarin duck in his backyard.
Clayton Kershaw: A playoff pitch.
Christian Yelich: A playoff bat.
Brendan Quinn: A wall big enough for his plaques.
Aaron Rodgers: A receiver with the acceleration of his girlfriend’s car.
Aaron Torres: 1,500 words.
Joe Rexrode: A steak so raw that it moos.
Tony Basilio: Another degree.
Paul Jones: A bumper sticker that reads: “My son is a Ninja Warrior.”
SEC football: Better offensive coaches.
Big 12 football: Better defensive coaches.
Billy Royce: Catnip.
Mary Constantine: A happy flight.
Smoky Mountains: A shuttle system.
Littons: Breakfast.
Phil Kaplan: Platinum premier.
Mike Wilson: A Chipper Jones bobble-head doll.
Blake Toppmeyer: Legalized gambling in Tennessee.
Dan Fleser: A cat-bite kit.
Lady Vols basketball: More five stars.
UT football: More four stars who play like four stars.
INSIDE UT SPORTS:Follow the Vols all year long
Jonathan Toye: A Texas drawl.
Tom Roberts: A left-handed hook shot.
Troy Provost-Heron: Continued recovery from the West Town accident.
David Powell: A bumper stick that reads: “I’d rather be on a Harley.”
Rick Russo: Body armor.
Jarrett Guarantano: Body armor.
Mike Strange: Normandy.
Neyland Stadium: Wider seats.
Udit Chaudhuri: A News Sentinel subscription.
Larah Grayson: The shirt off my back.
Mary Ann Venable: The best of health.
John Adams is a senior columnist. He may be reached at 865-342-6284 or john.adams@knoxnews.com. Follow him at: twitter.com/johnadamskns.
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