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Portlands last e-scooter ride?
Portland's last e-scooter ride? GETTY / MARIO TAMA / STAFF

GOOD MORNING, PORTLAND! Call Rene and Boo, gotta meet them soon. Tell T to call Shawn, I'll be there at 1. LET'S GO TO PRESS.

Trump's plan to erase and eradicate trans people is falling on deaf ears at OHSU, who is telling him to (metaphorically) go to hell.

The New York Times and other major media sources are finally coming around to the idea that there actually was "a blue wave" during the midterms after more and more Republican electoral strongholds are being snatched up by the Democrats.

Trump's White House is a cesspool of really grotesque people who can't get along—we know this truth to be self-evident. But when Melania Trump is calling for the firing of a national security official? IT IS GETTING BAD.

As a federal judge considers blocking Matthew Whitaker, Trump's pick for acting AG, the justice department is scrambling to prove that he's not a terrible choice who's riddled with conflicts of interest.

It looks like CNN's lawsuit to have reporter Jim Acosta's White House press pass reinstated might have legs after all.

Senate Majority Turtle Mitch McConnell has written an op-ed pleading for bipartisanship, and HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA... RIGHT. Go fuck yourself, turtle.

More photographs depicting the tragic aftermath of California's Camp Fire disaster are emerging, and the sight is nothing less than apocalyptic.

Amazon has chosen both New York and Virginia to become home for their second headquarters, and are saying the $2 billion in subsidies they received from the states weren't a factor.

IN LOCAL NEWS: Portland is pulling the plug on e-scooters (at least temporarily) as of November 20, when the previously agreed upon pilot project is done—and the scooter companies are not happy about it.


Portland has a plan to reduce cars in the downtown core... by increasing parking? Wait... what? (Luckily our Blair Stenvick explains.)

IN INTERGALACTIC NEWS: Was an actual UFO spotted over Ireland? And were they aliens that have come to rescue us from Trump and the dangerously corrupt Republican party? Is my desperation showing?

Now let's check on this thing we call WEATHER: Look for occasional showers today with a high of 53.

And finally... hey! HEY MA! THERE'S A CRAZY-LOOKING FUCKING CAT OUT HERE!