West Indies bowl England out for 187: second Test, day one – as it happened

Jonny Bairstow is having a chat on Sky Sports

“Batting was tough, that was pretty evident. There was a lot of uneven bounce and it was very challenging. There were two different grass types on the pitch - there’s either a ridge there or it’s something to do with the grass, and that’s why the bounce was variable.

“I don’t think you ever felt ‘in’ as a batsman, because you knew there might be a ball that bounces more than expected or keeps low, especially with the height of their bowlers.

“Tomorrow will be an interesting day. I thought we bowled really well tonight and were unlucky not to get a few nicks. You can say we could have been fuller but it was really bouncing from a good length.”

21st over: West Indies 30-0 (Brathwaite 11, Campbell 16) That’s the end of a near perfect day for the West Indies. They won a vital toss and bowled with malevolent intent, even if they were erratic at times, to dismiss England for 187. Their openers then showed restraint and determination to survive an angry spell from Stuart Broad, particularly the newcomer Joel Campbell. The pitch seems to have flattened out; if it stays that way tomorrow, England are in a deal of trouble.

20th over: West Indies 27-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 16) The penultimate over of the day, bowled by Curran, brings an optimistic LBW appeal against Brathwaite and not much else. It pitched outside leg.

19th over: West Indies 25-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 15) There’s a suggestion England will keep their review because of Sam Curran’s no-ball. I’m not sure that would be fair, especially as it was missing the stumps as well. We’ll see. Meanwhile, Campbell fresh-airs a loose hook stroke at Stokes, who after a slow start is revving up nicely. Just in time for the close of play.

“That initial optimism of Jimmy and Broad in true face-on mode has evaporated, eh Rob?” says Guy Hornsby. “For a team that’s got so much to like about it, we’re really developing a brittle top five with a silky underbelly. It seems that against accurate, aggressive bowling we just don’t really cut it. And I swore I would have a night off the gin.”

I wouldn’t be too critical today, I think they just lost a hugely important toss. I do, however, reserve the right to call them a bunch of *?!$* if West Indies are 700 for four in two days’ time.

18th over: West Indies 24-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 14) It wasn’t even umpire’s call - it was bouncing over the stumps. England have had a bit of a beast with that review.

Turns out it was a no-ball from Sam Curran. Great stuff. We didn’t even get to see whether it would have been out - and England also lose a review.

I reckon this will be umpire’s call and therefore not out. It was a lovely inswinger from Curran to Brathwaite, and I thought it would be given out on the field. Kumar Dharmasena thought about it for a long time before giving it not out.

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17th over: West Indies 23-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 14) In the last 15 years, the West Indies have won only two Test series against teams other than Bangladesh and Zimbabwe. They beat England in 2008-09 and New Zealand in 2012. This, in other words, is kind of a big deal.

“Thank you, Rob,” says Sara Torvalds. “Of course a house-style/forgetting-house-style thing (8th over) doesn’t really help me to choose between Windies and the Windies. Other than giving the semi-official Grauniad stamp of approval to whatever comes to my mind, which is obviously good enough. Also: #FinnsForFinn, obviously! (Ah, I came so close to getting Finny’s autograph at the Oval in the 2013 Ashes... On the other hand that means I still have that to look forward to before I die.)”

16th over: West Indies 23-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 14) Sam Curran replaces Stuart Broad, who bowled a heartfelt spell of 7-2-10-0, and swerves a lovely first delivery past Campbell’s outside edge. It’s a quiet over thereafter. The West Indies openers are strokeless, batting for the close. It’s an approach with which it’s hard to disagree, never mind go the full social media on them.

“The prisoner paradox has really made my head spin,” says Edward Cotterill. “For a second I completely lost concentration of the task in hand of listening to the radio commentary and trying not to lament the fact that it isn’t TMS.”

15th over: West Indies 22-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 13) Breaking news: England are in the doodoo. There is increasingly persuasive evidence that this was a huge toss for West Indies to win, and that they have a serious chance to bat England out of the series tomorrow. Blimey.

Stokes’ second over is slightly better, though Brathwaite is still able to leave most of the deliveries outside off stump.

14th over: West Indies 21-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 12) Campbell is starting to look more comfortable after a torrid, slightly comical start to his innings, although he still finds time to be beaten outside off stump by Broad. That’s his one for the over.

13th over: West Indies 20-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 11) Ben Stokes replaces Jimmy Anderson. He should be a threat, both with swing and zip off the pitch, though his radar isn’t right in that over and it’s uneventful stuff.

12th over: West Indies 19-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 11) There’s just over half an hour remaining, and England could really do with at least one wicket plus a nightwatchman. Broad beats Brathwaite on the inside with a good delivery that comes back a fair way. I do agree with the commentators, however, that there is a bit of Perth syndrome going on. It looks good because the ball keeps flying past the bat, but it isn’t necessarily full enough to threaten the edge or the stumps.

11th over: West Indies 18-0 (Brathwaite 8, Campbell 10) Anderson lands painfully in his delivery stride, prompting a short delay while he sorts out the strapping on his left ankle. He should be fine.

“This cheery conversation about death reminds me of a puzzle that I still can’t quite understand, told me when I was young,” says Ian Forth. “A prisoner is told he’s going to be executed next week but the exact day is to be a surprise. He works out that if he gets to Saturday, the last day, it can no longer be a surprise. Therefore it can’t be the Saturday. But if it can’t be Saturday, and he gets to Friday, it can’t be Friday either. And so, logically, he goes back through the week and reasons that he can’t be executed because none of the days will be a surprise. And yet it is a surprise when they come for him on Tuesday.”

The subject matter of Craig David’s music really has evolved.

10th over: West Indies 16-0 (Brathwaite 6, Campbell 10) Hahaha. Broad’s first delivery is met with an attempted lap scoop (L-A-P-S-C-O-O-P) from Campbell, who misses it by a long way and is hit in the grille. Broad looks at Campbell with a level of contempt and disgust which no existing language can adequately convey. That was entirely hilarious. Campbell responds with the best shot of the innings, punching a full ball through mid off for four. Broad turns straight on his heels and walks back to his mark in the chastened style.

“Hello Rob,” says Tony Brennan. “There’s a potential conflict chez Brennan, as we find ourselves half an hour from Death in Paradise on BBC1, and a battle for the TV remote is likely to ensue. One of us wants to watch a barely credible drama from the Caribbean, where a selection of UK household names are laid out by a reverse they didn’t see coming, whereas the wife will definitely be up for Death in Paradise.”

Wayhay!! Unlike Death in Paradise, and probably the England batsmen, Tony Brennan is here all week.

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9th over: West Indies 12-0 (Brathwaite 6, Campbell 6) Anderson’s not happy. This is not in itself news, as he’s on a cricket field, but he seems unhappy with himself and how the ball is coming out, rather than with anyone else. When he gets it right off the last ball of the over, Brathwaite edges a fraction short of fourth slip. England haven’t bowled badly, but they need a wicket quicksmart.

“Never mind Finny, Rob,” says Phil Sawyer. “Having been extolling the virtues of Toby Roland-Jones for years, I was gutted at how abruptly his England career was cut short by injury. Saw Finn and TRJ bowling in tandem at Scarbados a couple of years ago, and TRJ definitely looked like the one with more of the elusive ‘nip’.”

Good point, that. My old Wisden.com acquaintance Jonathan Hungin never shuts up about him, and I would love to see him on this pitch.

8th over: West Indies 8-0 (Brathwaite 5, Campbell 3) Broad bowls, Campbell plays and misses, Broad abuses him. I should Ctrl+C that sentence, as it has happened at least seven times in this innings, including thrce in this over. However, Nasser Hussain and Ian Bishop, commentating on Sky, reckon Broad’s length is not quite full enough, which is why the ball is beating the bat rather than finding the edge.

“I need some help,” says Sara Torvalds. “English is my third language, so I’ve yet to grasp the pattern that determines when it’s ‘the West Indies’ and when it’s just ‘West Indies’. When I started following cricket back in 2009, coincidentally when England were touring (the) West Indies and I learnt to love the game after clicking headlines like ‘Where on earth does this humiliation leave England?’ and ‘England humiliated by rampant West Indies’, I had enough new terminology to learn that I did not pay attention to the definite article. Now I’m ready to rectify this omission. Is it a geography vs cricket team thing? Or are there other considerations? Please enlighten me!”

In my experience it’s just a house-style thing. Or, to be more accurate, a my-feckless-generation-forgetting-house-style-and-doing-whatever-comes-to-mind-at-that-precise-moment thing.

7th over: West Indies 8-0 (Brathwaite 5, Campbell 3) Anderson bowls a couple of deliveries from rround the wicket to the right-handed Brathwaite before switching back to the orthodox stance. Brathwaite digs out a dangerous outswinging yorker.

“I’d like to know when I’m going to die,” says Damian Clarke. “Years from now, might as well clean the bathroom. Day after tomorrow, there’s some people I’d like to let know just what I think of them.”

I can sense a new Ricky Gervais film coming on.

6th over: West Indies 8-0 (Brathwaite 5, Campbell 3) Campbell didn’t do much wrong there. He kicked the ball away, though I suspect Anderson thought he dragged his spikes over the ball. Campbell isn’t doing much right with the bat, mind you. Broad beats him again with a trampolining short ball, though he is able to work a couple off the pads to relieve a bit of pressure.

5th over: West Indies 5-0 (Brathwaite 4, Campbell 1) A terrific over from Anderson, who follows a series of outswingers to Campbell with a huge inswinger that almost sneaks between bat and pad. At the moment, well though he is bowling, Anderson feels like the supporting act to Broad, who is emphatically on one. Anderson was unhappy with something that Campbell did to the ball when it was dead, though I’m not sure what it was.

“What do you reckon a Steven Finn from 7-8 years ago could do on this pitch (sobs)?” sobs Kevin Wilson.

Thanks, Kevin, that’s lifted the mood. Next time, why don’t you just email me the date I’m going to die?

Ach, Finny, I miss him so. Even the 2015-16 version would have been rampant on this pitch.

4th over: West Indies 4-0 (Brathwaite 3, Campbell 1) Thanks Daniel, hello again. Campbell misses an almighty yahoo at Broad, who generously provides some four-letter technical advice at the end of his follow through. Broad is all over Campbell: he beats him later in the over with a beauty and then has a desperate LBW appeal turned down by Kumar Dharmasena. Broad celebrated first and appealed almost as an afterthought, but it looked high and Joe Root wisely decided not to review. That was, nonetheless, a sensational over from Broad.

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3rd over: West Indies 4-0 (Brathwaite 3, Campbell 1) Foakes did indeed bruise his hand getting out; it reminds me of the time my “friends” left some chips out, with Insanity Sauce disguised as ketchup also on the plate, and next to it, vodka disguised as water. Anderson isn’t quite there yet -after Brathwaite shoves on to mid on, he doesn’t make Campbell play enough; and when he does hit one, mistake at point allows him to break his duck.

“Things I love about the England Test side (part 539)“ tweets ASNaturalAsRain. “Their ability to fashion a collapse even from a position of recovery. A layered collapse...it’s like bloody Inception With that said, the Windies bowling...the rejuvenated Windies full-stop, for that matter...”

Right, that’s me. Rob Smyth will take you through to the close and you can regale him on rob.smyth@theguardian.com

2nd over: West Indies 2-0 (Brathwaite 2, Campbell 0) Broad begins with some leg-side muck but is on the money thereafter; Brathwaite fumbles him around the corner for a single. This gives him a go at Campbell, who can’t decide whether or not to play, eventually getting out of the road. Two more dots follow, before an absolute beauty kicks off the seam and rears up and away from yerman; this pitch is still doing plenty.

“I must confess I was rather rattled by Kim Thonger’s tea-time definition of failure,” says Brian Withingto, “that initially seemed to be veering alarmingly towards a rather more personal diagnosis than the demise of the sinking ship SS Great Britain. Having just regained my personal composure I see that a rampant WI have now laid waste to England’s flaccid tail. What would Kim make of it all, I wonder?”

1st over: West Indies 1-0 (Brathwaite 1, Campbell 0) Why don’t the Barmy Army cut out the middle man, and just clap themselves instead of singing Jerusalem then clapping themselves? Anderson is quickly into stride, beating Brathwaite’s outside edge, and then drawing him forward to poke a single. A beauty of Anderson is that England don’t need to panic if they don’t get wickets immediately, because he’ll not go for runs - but it’s unlikely Broad sees things in those terms.

Cricinfo are saying that Bairstow is keeping - perhaps Foakes hurt his hand while getting himself out, for extra points.

Out come the players...

Roach was the pick of the bowlers, but don’t underestimate the contribution of Gabriel, who picked up three wickets despite being off his game, and Joseph, whose magic ball got rid of Joe Root. In other words, they’re a proper unit, and isn’t that great to see.

Well bowled West Indies. England fought back in the afternoon session, but were given almost nothing following tea. If Anderson and Broad can’t find something special, and quickly, this series will be over by Sunday morning.

Very well done. Anderson backs away to avoid another short one, exactly what Gabriel wanted him to do; he fires in a yorker, it’s straight, and that’s ta-ra.

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61st over: England 187-9 (Broad 0, Anderson 1) Burns, Denly, Root and Buttler scored 18 between them - that’s been the problem for England. Just another 50 and there’s something to defend, but they’re in big trouble here. It’s possible that the new ball caused the trouble, but more likely it was the freshness of the pitch, which is to say that it was a monstrous toss to win. If that’s so, England will do well to concede a first-innings deficit of 100. Anderson does really well to get above a lifter, absorbing it in his gloves - that should soften him up for more short stuff, eh?

60th over: England 187-9 (Broad 0, Anderson 1) Roach has bowled really well today. That angle from around is bothering the lefties, Flintoff-style, and his energy and accuracy have been excellent. But, back in his spiritual home, the Burnley Lara, gets off the mark with a nurdle to leg.

When it goes, it goes fast. Roach extracts some extra bounce and Curran, leaning forward, can’t cover it, instead edging to fourth slip. Excellent captaincy from Holder to put a man there.

Foakes goes again at a short one but is through the pull too early, taking the ball with his gloves from outside leg and rearranging his own stumps. Whoops. Whatever England finish with now, it’ll likely be too few.

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59th over: England 186-7 (Foakes 35, Curran 6) Curran was clearly one of those kids who people would mistakenly pick on, only to be savaged in a blur of athletic temper. Gabriel worked him over in Barbados, but he’s not at all arsed, gliding him to the long-on fence with dismissive ease then getting off strike with a single to cover.

58th over: England 181-7 (Foakes 35, Curran 1) Roach nuzzles one against Curran’s left hand, which does not look pleasant but earns a single. On the balcony, SJ Broad pouts handsomely - the stage is set for his second Test ton.

57th over: England 180-7 (Foakes 35, Curran 0) Gabriel strays too far to leg with a short one and Foakes hoiks him around the corner for two, then goes again at a better version of the same, missing. England are struggling to score here, which is a problem given the nature of the pitch.

56th over: England 178-7 (Foakes 33, Curran 0) Curran will feel like who owes his team a score here, after they sold him down the river in Barbados. He plays out three dots.

“I feel so ancient,” says Andrew Clifton. “Someone is looking at that Del Shannon video and saying - ‘Oh look, there’s grannie. Or more likely great grannie’.”

I was introduced to that song by Jive Bunny and the Mastermixers, I think.

This is huge. Moeen looks to go over the top but is surprised by some surprise bounce, splicing to midwicket.

56th over: England 178-6 (Ali 60, Foakes 33) Roach propels one perfectly, pretty hand, wrist and seam all in a row row row, and it’s too good for Moeen. England are riding it a bit here.

55th over: England 178-6 (Ali 60, Foakes 33) Out of nowhere, Gabriel finds some late away-swing - it’s much too good for Foakes, who fumbles for appearance’s sake before pretending that it never happened. Maiden, but only because a straight drive off the final delivery hits the stumps at the non-striker’s.

54th over: England 178-6 (Ali 60, Foakes 33) Ohhhh look at that! Roach gives Moeen some width, so he presses forward then caresses over point for four. He likes that one, yes he does, striking the pose and holding it before vogueing with his bat. But Roach responds well, beating him with a little bit of away movement just outside off.

53rd over: England 174-6 (Ali 56, Foakes 33) It’s Gabriel from the other end; I hope his dressing-room nickname is Del. Foakes nurdles around his pad for one, bringing Moeen and his nodding dog bat back onto strike. He’s leaving wherever possible, but squirts a single to square leg to extend the partnership to 81.

52nd over: England 172-6 (Ali 55, Foakes 32) Foakes is a bit of an RC Russell isn’t he. They spent tiiiiime not picking him because his batting wasn’t good enough, then they picked him and he made runs straight away. Anyway, Roach is bowling and sends down three dots to Moeen, who then follows one but misses and leaves the next two.

“I’ll just put this out there, having seen plenty of both of them. When Jos Buttler and Ben Foakes bat in the same innings, Foakes will outscore Buttler more often than not.”

Maybe, but then that’s not the point of Buttler - he’s there for peaks, not averages.