Stand aside, all ye hotels, B&Bs and guesthouses that claim to be off the beaten track, for Three Glens has upped the stakes: it is completely off the map. Indeed, the place is so new that even satellite images of Dumfriesshire haven’t caught up with it. And when they do, its grass roof, sloping at the same angle as the hill it sits on, will render the house all but invisible from above. As if this were not enough, from the ground it has been cleverly camouflaged to blend in with the dry-stone walls that surround it. Melding ski chalet luxury with an ultra-green ethos, it’s the sort of building that should come with its own Kevin McCloud voiceover.
I confess that by the time I’d climbed the steep farm track on my ancient bicycle to reach the house, I was slightly concerned that my sweaty and somewhat dishevelled state might be frowned upon in such swish surroundings. I was instantly put at ease by the bright and breezy Julie who, with her husband Steve, runs the guesthouse for Neil and Mary Gourlay, the brains behind this über-eco retreat.
“You’re in the big bedroom,” Julie announced as she took me downstairs from the voluminous kitchen-cum-living-area, a bright and airy space with a high ceiling, exposed stonework and picture windows so large I feel as though I’m still outside. The decor combines sleek modern lines with reclaimed fixtures and fittings, and as we strode along the corridor towards the four guest rooms, sensors flicked LED lights on above us.
I had spent much of the previous night stargazing in the nearby Galloway Forest Dark Sky Park, so the enormous bed was a welcome sight, as was the en suite wet room complete with freestanding bath and the sort of shower that drenches rather than sprinkles. The Three Glens is set in the midst of a working farm, as was evidenced by the sheep stampede I inadvertently set off when I left later that day to cycle the mile to the village of Moniaive. This buzzing little musically gifted community teems with absurdly happy, festival-loving people. “The village is probably home to more festivals per capita than any other place in Britain,” Tim, the landlord at the Craigdarroch Arms, affirmed. I can believe it too – one of the village cats I met was even called Zimmerman in honour of Bob Dylan.
The turbine blowing in the wind near Three Glens is just one of its eco-friendly elements. The building, which is all but off-grid, has clearly been designed with the aim of making an eco-warrior’s head explode with joy. It has ground source heating, a biomass stove, cladding from local wind-felled oaks, woollen insulation provided by the farm’s stampeding sheep, and much more greenness besides.
Wool is not the only thing the sheep provide. The vast majority of food served at the Three Glens is produced on the farm – lamb, beef, pork, venison, eggs, sea trout and game are all on the menu in season, with a kitchen garden up the road supplying all manner of fruit and vegetables to keep happy-clappy vegans like me content, and food miles to a minimum.
But memories are not made of sustainable features, however impressive. It was the view through the (triple-glazed) picture windows and the decked balcony that I took home with me: a glorious soul-easing sweep down the eponymous three glens (Craigdarroch, Dalwhat and Castlefairn), with Moniaive nestling at their centre. As I dined on Julie’s penne all’arrabbiata con spinaci (fruit of a stint in Tuscany), I watched as darkness engulfed the little village until, appropriately, all that was left was pinpricks of light forming a pattern like notes upon a stave.
Three Glens (01848 200589, 3glens.com); room only £85pp, B&B £110pp, half-board £145pp. The trip was arranged by Alastair Sawdays (01172 047810, sawdays.co.uk)
Ask a local
Klur Memphis Robertson, bass guitarist, born and bred in Moniaive
Moniaive’s annual folk festival invades seven venues in the village on the second weekend of May; while the Michaelmas Bluegrass Festival draws in top international musicians at the end of September. And to witness one of the nation’s great pub jam sessions, head for the Craigdarroch Arms on New Year’s Day, when musicians turn up from midday onwards and play through to midnight.
The Green Tea House in Moniaive is an award-winning, mainly veggie cafe that turns into a bistro at night. The newly reopened Piccola Italia is a surprisingly classy restaurant for a small village.
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