Michigan's domestic violence shelters to get $400K boost from DTE Energy Foundation

All 44 of the state-funded domestic violence shelters in Michigan will be eligible for one-time grants totaling $400,000 from the DTE Energy Foundation, the organization announced Wednesday.  

The dollar amount awarded to each shelter will be determined by the number of beds it has to house people fleeing abuse.

"When you realize how many people are affected within the state of Michigan and nationally, for that matter, by domestic violence, ... it was a really an easy decision," said Trevor Lauer, president of DTE Electric, a subsidiary of DTE Energy and a member of the DTE Energy Foundation board of directors. "It was not a hard one for us to get our arms around doing something that so well aligns with helping our communities."

The minimum award will be $5,000, Lauer said, and the money can be used for everything from day-to-day operations to help provide programming or support services for survivors of domestic violence as they try to establish lives away from their abusers. 

Intimate partner violence affects about 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. 

Homicide is among the leading causes of death for women 44 and younger, according to a 2017 U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention report that analyzed homicide data from the National Violent Death Reporting System among 10,018 women older than 18 in 18 states, including Michigan, from 2003-14.

More than half of those homocides — 55% — were tied to intimate partner violence.

Lt. Gov. Garlin Gilchrist said the announcement of these DTE Foundation grants fills a critical need in the state.

"Nearly all of us know someone we are closely connected to who has been a survivor or a victim of domestic abuse," Gilchrist said. "It's important to me and to our administration that we are stepping up to meet everyone's needs because this is a problem that doesn't discriminate in terms of geography. It happens all across the state. That's why I appreciate DTE making a grant to every center in the state of Michigan because we want to make sure resources are available to everyone."

Kelly Mays, 44, of Westland said she's gotten a lot of support and encouragement from Oakland County's domestic violence shelter, HAVEN, in the years since she left an abusive ex-boyfriend. 

She recalled the day in May 2009 when she went to his apartment to ask why he hadn't come to their daughter's first birthday party.

He lashed out, Mays said, punching her. When she fell to the ground, he then began to kick her in the face and head so brutally, she had a concussion and damage to her ear.

A decade later, she still struggles with some memory loss and is partially deaf in her left ear.

She remembers getting an ambulance taking her to a nearby hospital after the attack.  

"I apologized to the EMTs," she said. "I apologized to the doctors, to the staff because I was like, 'I'm sorry for taking up your time. It's all my fault. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't have upset him.'

"And they were just looking at me like, 'Really? This is not your fault.' ... They were just so affirming and so validating that it made me feel like OK, maybe this wasn't my fault."

More:Deadly love: Women are most likely to be killed by an intimate partner, CDC reports

More:Oakland County woman describes torture, abuse from husband — and the day she killed him

Her mindset began to change. But what solidified Mays' decision to leave was when her older daughter, who was 13 at the time came to her and said, "Mom, I'm really over you getting abused and seeing all the bruises."

"I credit her for saving my life, you know?" she said. To hold herself accountable for the decision she had made to leave, Mays posted to Facebook about the attack, and asked her friends and followers to help her stay away from her ex-boyfriend. 

Hundreds of messages of support poured in, and Mays had the encouragement she needed to start building a new life for herself and her daughters. 

Mays went on to get her master's degree, and now works as a limited licensed professional counselor. She also competes in poetry slams, and speaks about domestic violence for HAVEN.

"HAVEN has done so much for me by giving me a chance to tell my story. By telling my story, now I can give back to others. ... My life will never be the same because of them and the support they have given me."

She said she's hopeful that the DTE Foundation grants will make a big difference for other shelters around the state, too.

"I think it's amazing," she said. "For the trans community, there's not a lot of resources available for them," when it comes to domestic violence, Mays said. "For men, they are really embarrassed or ashamed to talk about their partners that are battering them. For women, there's this great fear. They feel isolated. They feel like there's nothing else out there for them. But there is. To be able to have somewhere out there where they can go and feel safe, you know, to begin that healing journey, it's amazing. Shout out to DTE for doing that."

Emma Peterson, executive director of the YWCA Interim House in Detroit, the largest domestic violence shelter in the state with a capacity of 67 beds, the money will be put to good use. 

"Every woman we see who is fleeing a domestic violence relationship is coming to our program with no less than two to three children." Peterson said, adding that right now, 21 women and 45 children are being sheltered at Interim House. 

"Those dollars will help us to do a quick turnaround in order to help them to achieve their goals. We provide bus tickets. If they have a car, we provide gas cards, and we also fulfill personal needs for the women and their children. We get them milk and diapers and we also have support groups that come in to the shelter."

With the support of the DTE Energy Foundation grant, Peterson said she hopes to be able to expand the support groups and other services Interim House can offer to help women and their children achieve their goals. Women and children can stay 30 to 90 days at Interim House while they work to establish independence.

"One of the requirements of our program is that every woman in our program, once they leave, we anticipate that they will have a job and they will have housing," she said. "We have a high turnover rate so they can move to a safe environment."

Lynette Dowler, president of the DTE Energy Foundation, said the grant money should fill in the gaps to provide things shelters can't afford to give survivors of domestic violence with the money they already get from the state.   

"The way we think about it is it would be it would be funding for the things that would be over and above what their state funding already provides to them," Dowler said.

The money won't be restricted, and could pay for providing transportation to domestic violence survivors as they look for work or helping them get to the bank to open their own checking and savings accounts. 

"Really, we believe it's going to be for wraparound services that help the the victims be successful in kind of breaking the chain that they've been living in," she said. 

And that, said Mays, is so important. 

"The worst thing that we can do in society is to kind of go hands-off when it comes to domestic violence," she said. "People don't want to talk about it. It's an ugly truth. ... It's a societal problem, not just a problem with that survivor and that abuser because we're all affected by it.

"When organizations stand up and say, 'You know what? We're responsible for the community and we're going to show what we can to help others' is amazing."

In addition to the $400,000 in grants, the DTE Energy Foundation also is partnering with the Michigan Department of Health and Human Services to host training sessions for employees at the state's domestic violence shelters, too, so they can learn new skills and build more sustainable financial models, Dowler said. 

The shelters eligible for grant funding are: 

• Family Counseling and Children’s Services, Adrian
• Hope Shores Alliance, Alpena
• SafeHouse Center, Ann Arbor
• S.A.F.E. Place, Battle Creek
• Bay Area Women’s Center, Bay City
• Children and Family Services of Southwestern Michigan/Safe Shelter, Benton Harbor
• Women’s Information Service, Inc., Big Rapids
• Cadillac Area O.A.S.I.S, Cadillac
• Barbara Kettle Gundlach Shelter, Calumet
• HDC/Thumb Area Assault Crisis Center, Caro
• Brand County Coalition Against Domestic Violence, Coldwater
• YWCA of Metropolitan Detroit/Interim House, Detroit
• Tri County Safe Harbor, Escanaba
• YWCA of Greater Flint/SAFE House, Flint
• YWCA of West Central Michigan, Grand Rapids
• River House, Grayling
• Domestic Harmony, Hillsdale
• Center for Women in Transition, Holland
• LACASA, Howell
• RAVE, Ionia
• Caring House Inc., Iron Mountain
• DOVE, Ironwood
• AWARE, Jackson
• YWCA of Kalamazoo, Kalamazoo
• Baraga County Shelter Home, L’Anse
• End Violent Encounters (EVE), Lansing
• Lapeer Area Citizens Against Domestic Assault, Lapeer
• Communities Overcoming Violent Encounters, Ludington
• CHOICES of Manistee County, Manistee
• Women’s Center/Harbor House, Marquette
• Shelterhouse/Council on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault, Midland
• Family Counseling and Shelter Services of Monroe County, Monroe
• Turning Point, Mt. Clemens
• Women’s Aid Service, Mt. Pleasant
• Every Women’s Place, Muskegon
• Women’s Resource Center of Northern Michigan, Petoskey
• First Step, Plymouth/Wayne
• HAVEN, Pontiac
• Blue Water Safe Horizons, Port Huron
• Underground Railroad, Saginaw
• Diane Peppler Resource Center, Sault Ste. Marie
• SafeCenter, St. Johns/Owosso
• Domestic and Sexual Abuse Services, Three Rivers
• Women’s Resource Center Grand Traverse Area, Traverse City

"It doesn't matter how many times you try to leave and go back, you know, as long as you keep trying," said Mays. "That's the important thing to know. There is help out there and people who care and love you and believe you."

How to get help

If you or someone you know is being abused, the National Domestic Violence Hotline also has a toll-free 24-hour crisis line: 800-799-7233. Additionally, several local agencies can offer crisis assistance as well. They include:

In Wayne County

The YWCA Interim House is a domestic and sexual violence shelter that provides safe refuge along with food, clothing, advocacy and counseling to victims of abuse. Its 24-hour crisis line is 313-861-5300.

Wayne County SAFE offers forensic medical exams for rape and sexual assault victims in Wayne County and provides help for victims of any kind of sexual violence, including rape, sex trafficking, child abuse and incest. Call its crisis pager 24-hours a day for crisis intervention at 313-430-8000. Learn more at http://wcsafe.org/.

First Step serves western Wayne County and Downriver, and has a 24-hour help hotline at 734-722-6800 or 888-453-5900. Learn more at www.firststep-mi.org.

Macomb County

Turning Point offers a 24-hour help hotline at 586-463-6990. The agency also offers an emergency shelter for victims and their children, counseling, advocacy, safety planning and more. Details: turningpointmacomb.org.

Oakland County

HAVEN offers a 24-hour toll-free crisis line at 877-922-1274 along with live chatting on its website, www.haven-oakland.org. The agency also offers emergency shelter for victims and their children, counseling, advocacy, safety planning and more

Washtenaw County

SafeHouse Center in Ann Arbor offers a 24-hour crisis line at 734-995-5444. The agency also offers emergency shelter, counseling, support, safety planning, advocacy and more. Learn more at www.safehousecenter.org.

Livingston County

LACASA Center provides comprehensive services for victims and survivors of child abuse, domestic violence and sexual assault. Its 24-hour help line is available by calling 866-522-2725. Services and programs include a crisis shelter, and Safe Pet Place for shelter residents' family pets; individual counseling and support groups for children and adults; legal advocacy services, and a private and confidential Sexual Assault Response Center. Go to lacasacenter.org.